What’s the worst thing that can happen to a werewolf? Unable to shift for three months, Mateo Cruz knows all too well. His wolf has taken up residence in his head, taunting him night and day with vividly violent and carnal thoughts. Convinced he’s cursed, he needs the help of a powerful witch before he literally goes insane.

​Evie Savoie has always obeyed the house rules of her coven — no werewolves. They’re known for being moody and volatile. So, when a distempered, dangerous werewolf strolls into the bar and almost strangles one of her late-night customers, she’s ready to bounce him through the door. But the desperation in his eyes when he begs her to help him softens her heart and convinces her to bend the rules.

I didn’t read the blurb going in – if I had, I would have known how painfully predictably the story was – I just had a recommendation about a werewolf story and ran with it.

Ah, I haven’t cringed this much while reading in a while.

This was… uncomfortable.

Her breasts were “my girls”, her vagina was “my little lady”, and there was a “my nipples saluted with gusto” (is this a pen name and the author is really a man?).

The language didn’t work for me, and some lines made me gag: “I ogled the menu and wanted to spank it and make it my bitch” then calls the menu “amazeballs” and the restaurant they’re at is the “epicest” surprise ever.

And once I think Mateo’s arm was “muscle clad” as if muscles are something you put on in the morning when you’re getting dressed.

It was unintentional, a result of trying to type on my phone while walking, that pinned this GIF to the top of the notes I was taking:

But then again, we can’t be completely sure it wasn’t a Freudian slip because it does reflect how I feel about the book…

Both main characters were immature for being in their thirties.

But Evie is the worse offender.

She’s so immature I had a hard time believing she was supposed to be in her thirties. They both read like college kids.

Evie had one long-term relationship with a guy who dismissed her dream as stupid and ever since she’d been validating his opinion by hiding her art from everyone else, including her highly emotionally supportive sisters that were an active part of her daily life.

Her personality was nothing but comic/movie references yet her interest in them was incredibly shallow.

Evie was starved for validation (validation, which she got from Mateo after he bullied her into it), but it didn’t feel like that would be a healthy or long-lasting relationship.

Does that become an issue that will be tackled later in the series? I doubt it, everything was too awesome.

And everyone was so perfect.

Everyone was so physically stunning. Perfect will always be boring. Not to mention, unrealistic.

I was hoping this would have been a fun, tongue-in-cheek book with witches and werewolves, but it was just a poorly developed plot designed to get these two characters into bed, and into what seems like a very toxic relationship.

It wasn’t a realistic, or even a good, representation of how relationships evolve.

If you’re gonna read this, be ready to be in their heads as they obsess about each other. Constantly.

It’s not good writing for me to hear about how great Evie’s ass and giant rack are while she still manages to be a tiny, bitty thing again and again and again. And again. Seriously.

And passing off what the two MCs had as love? Eh, more like lust. But no wait, for a book with sex, it still manages to shame sex. Confusing, I know. Believe me, I know.

Speaking of things you’re gonna hear more than once: only witches are permitted at the witches-only shindig and everyone needs to respect that.

Oh, except for the one werewolf who can just waltz in because there “are no bouncers” – talk about a room full of magic users being a complete waste of space.

And while Mateo is a Nice Guy, Alpha, the wolf part of him, is an alpha-hole and we’re supposed to what…? Think it’s quaint that the MC gets to be both things? He gets to be a chivalrous asshole?

Did I enjoy it?

I dunno, man. This book so isn’t for me.

It would have been nice if I could have just sat back and enjoyed the ride, but the issues are just so glaring, the writing is tropey and so, so full of clichés, the characters are underdeveloped and the plot goes from inconsistent to more inconsistent.

I spent a lot of the book grimacing and cringing, going “What the fuck?” and “Seriously?”

FMC was needy af and MC was more than happy to bully her.

Like when he told her he was “clean and wanted nothing between them” and she just gave in rather than ran for the hills…

I can appreciate having words of degradation as a love language (and it makes for really fun banter), but this wasn’t it. Mateo, while the book desperately made the case for him being a nice guy, he actually was just a big jerk.

And the Fan Girl trope was just insulting.

To portray her as this girl stuck in her adolescence that squeals at the smallest mention of her thing…. *deep sigh* people do grow up and mature and still love the things they love.

Evie’s supposed to be a powerful badass hex breaker witch, but she’s like a sixteen-year-old gushing over her incredibly shallow topic of interest – and will apparently fall for any guy who bothers to put on ONE theme night in order to get into her pants.

Enjoyable? A few little bits, yes. Mostly, it was just cringe.

About as cringe as the time I went for a walk on the beach and saw a couple having butt-sex in plain view of everyone.

The worst part of that wasn’t even the public sex (which was heinous not only because there was a group of school kids just around the corner) but it was that the guy was having a macho moment sticking it up her ass, while the girl looked like she was mindlessly scrolling on her phone.

Did they notice me? Idk.

If they did, they knew where they were and what they were doing. It would have been hard for them to not see me passing by.

So, did I like anything about the book? I like the cover, it’s very pretty. Cudos to whoever did that design.

Rapid-fire round:

  • Did the book meet your expectations? No, I was hoping for more of a vibe and this was just pulp.
  • Who was your favourite character in the book and why? Mateo and Alpha’s relationship was the most interesting, but not for the face-value of it.
  • Who was your least favourite character in the book and why? Evie, if you’re gonna be a comic nerd, don’t make all your favourite comics movies.
  • Did you relate to any of the characters? The Grim’s because they got to sit this one out.
  • What themes or messages did you take away from the book? Don’t read pulp unless in a good place with your mental health. It’s depressing.
  • Was there anything in the book that surprised you or that you didn’t expect? The hex was wahaaay to epic for the level of this book.
  • What did you think of the ending of the book? I get that it was wish-fulfilment fantasy for Evie, but still like no. Just no.
  • What do you think the author’s intention was with the book? What message or theme do you think they were trying to convey? To write a fun, quirky, steamy story, but it’s just frustrating.
  • Which part of the book did you find most memorable? The end of the haunted house, but even that was disappointing.
  • Did you find any aspects of the book confusing or unclear? Why was the hex so complicated when the rest of the story was so vanilla?
  • Were there any moments in the book that made you emotional or had a strong impact on you? Yeah, all the times I wish I was reading Anne Rice instead. And the physical cringing it caused me.